Tuesday, April 8, 2008

360pregnantSuicideColoradoHalfEagleCeramicPants

So the NCAA bracket that I filled out for myself was actually looking pretty good until that damn Kansas ruined it. Oh well at least I didn't lose any money. All I have to do is work the glory hole in the men's bathroom at the Arnold Ponderosa for an hour shift. I do get to keep all my tips though.

I have actually been keeping myself relatively busy lately. Some of that time has been filled with cleaning the house, doing dishes and picking up dog shit, but so it goes.

On the video gaming front I have added a new member to the family: The XBOX 360. I bought a used one from big Joe Nahm. I debated it for a long time because I certainly have better things to spend my money on, but I love video games and although the Wii is great it does not offer a lot of the games that I want to play. I already played some Bioshock last night and it is pretty awesome. I am totally stuck on Rock you like a hurricane on Hard on Guitar Hero III. I have a new idea to beat it though and then I get to battle Slash.

So I didn't run in the half marathon. I do have a t-shirt so if I wasn't so honest I could tell everyone I ran, but I am not a liar. I can bench press 1000 pounds. It was pretty disappointing to get so close to being able to do it and have to quit, but it's ok. Assuming my knee is just overused I might try again. I signed up for Boot Camp classes here at work. This trainer from the YMCA will yell at us and make us run up stairs and stuff. Hopefully that will help get/keep me in shape.

I ate pizza and drank beer last night so this morning I felt a little churning down below. Since I was about to leave for work I went to the bathroom in the basement. There is not always toilet paper in there so I was happy that I saw some on the counter. Everything went fine. The reason I talk about this is I think it would be really funny to come out with a line of life like ceramic household necessities. It would anger and amuse people at the same time. Picture this: Jeff has to really use the facilities. He runs into the bathroom and sees a roll of toilet paper on the counter so is assured he will have a comfortable time. When it is time to wipe he grabs the roll and it is ceramic. This could also work for other important items like remote controls, shots of insulin, heart medication, tampons. The list is endless. This is not nearly as funny as I thought it was this morning, but I won't delete it so you can make fun of me later.

On Friday we went to see a free show starring Bald Eagle from Columbia. I saw this band before in Madison, WI when they played with my friend Shelby's band. I loved them then and I love them now. It is nothing groundbreaking, but it has good energy and a lot of dueling guitars/fretboard Olympics (as the Shadow calls it). We bought their 2nd CD and I listened to it like 6 times over the weekend.

On Saturday we went to this strange birthday partay for my friends Megan and Kelly. They are members of the now defunct bowling team "Jeff and the Funky Bunch." Kelly's boyfriend hosted the partay and his apartment was pretty cool. It is in a rehabbed synagogue. I am a lover of cool architecture so I liked just going in and looking at the space. Kelly's boyfriend was cool and the people I already knew there were good, but we had the best time making fun of this one guy after he left. He passed out books that he had published himself to some of the people at the partay. Keep in mind that this was, I believe, a white male in his early twenties who grew up in Suburban St. Louis. The book was told as a 16 year old girl from Fulton, Missouri going before a judge trying to get an abortion. I won't go into too many details, but it was pretty priceless. I'm sure he knows what it's like to be in her shoes though. I heard his mom considered a post birth abortion with him just last week. Happy Birthday Megan and Kelly.

Did you see this story about the guy who had a heart transplant from a guy who had committed suicide? He just committed suicide himself and he was married to the first guy's widow. She must be awesome to hang out with. http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/23984857/?GT1=43001

Isn't it so crazy that a person with lady parts down below became pregnant. Oh wait I mean Holy shit there is a pregnant man I can't believe it. I forgot that I am supposed to only react to headlines and not look at actual facts.

I am excited because the Mrs and I might be going to Colorado for Memorial Day weekend. This would break my Missouri only streak, but I think I can handle it. Actually I am going to break my streak the weekend before that going to the Omaha wedding. I am going to be such a world traveller in May. It will be good to see Johnny, Christmas and Kevin and their new digs. Casey also hasn't been to Colorado since she was like 2 years old.

I have a rip in the front of my pants and I might have to work from home the rest of the day. I always seem to wear my pants right until they tear right off my body.

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